Summative Identity Assignment

Changes in Identity through People's Relationships with Others 

Everyone you know has been changed because of your relationship with them. People, whether they like it or not, will always have their identity slightly transformed through their relationships with others. These transformations can be positive, and help the person’s growth, or they could be negative, and hinder their growth. A lack of relationships with other people can also transform people. These transformations happen to everyone, including myself. All this is seen in the short stories Brother Dear by Bernice Friesen, Just Lather, That’s All by Hernando Tellez, and The Charmer by Budge Wilson. Also in the poems Richard Cory by EA Robinson, Alone by Maya Angelou, and lastly Langston Hughs’ As I grew older.

            Since these transformations are made through people’s relationships with others, they can sometimes be negative transformations. For example, in Just Lather That’s All, the main character was just a simple barber, but Captain Torres’ entry influenced the barber’s thoughts to the point where he almost became a murderer! In the poem As I grew Older, racism was a very negative aspect in this woman’s life. It went even as far as to describe it as “a wall that rose, rose slowly, slowly, between me and my dream” lines 8-11. Obviously if racism was stopping her from achieving her dream, it was hindering her growth. Fortunately, in the end it had made her stronger so in the long run, she was able to achieve her dream. Another short story containing negative influences was The Charmer. In this story, it was the main girl’s daughter’s, blood-relation to the Charmer that transformed her identity. She became just like him, and had she never been related to the Charmer, she would never have had the same negative behaviour. While some people will be slightly transformed in negative ways through their relationships with others, a lack of relationships can also transform people.

            Having no relationship or connection to someone else can encourage transformations in people’s identities. In the poem Alone, it states “The race of man is suffering and I can hear the moan, ‘cause nobody, but nobody can make it out here alone.” Lines 30-34. The race of man is suffering only because there is a lack of relationships with others and so they are alone. If they had more relationships they wouldn’t be suffering. In the poem Richard Cory, Richard is good-looking and wealthy. While everyone was jealous of him and thought he must be happy, he ended up killing himself just because he had no one to relate to and was alone. In The Charmer, had there been a different relationship between the Charmer and his parents, it would have made him a better person. The lack of that parental-like relationship hindered his growth. Transformations of identity through relationships with other people happen to everyone, including myself.

            There are several ways that these stories and poems connect to my life. I have a similar situation to the narrator in the Charmer, where my little sister can get away with everything. This short story, however, has left me feeling educated, in the way that I will follow in the footsteps of the narrator, and not let my own child behave the way my sister can. I can also personally connect to Brother Dear, in the way that my older brother, like Greg, has chosen his own path even though it differs from our father’s ideas for us. This story left me feeling empowered, and made me believe I can choose what I want to do in my life like Sharlene, when she decided she would run away from home. “I guess I’d like to run away, too. Someday I will- to Europe”. Lastly I can definitely relate to the poem Alone. “Nobody, but nobody can make it out here alone.” One of my greatest fears is being alone, and so I now feel more determined than ever to remember to keep my values in order. While money may be nice, there’s nothing more important than keeping my friends and family first.

            Transformations are made in people’s identities by relationships with others. Sometimes these transformations are positive, other times they are negative. It’s even occasionally the lack of relationships that transforms identities. Most of the time it’s not even realized, but people are transformed through their relationships with others every day.